That Night Rung Ruined The Relationship Betting Pool

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THE LAST PROMPT!!!!

If anyone had asked Whirl before today, he would assured you a drunk Rung would have been adorable. Because come on, Rung was always kind of adorable, in that kinda dorky, nerd way! It was like, one of the few things they all could agree on!

So when Whirl finally–finally!!–got the guy plastered, he was mightily pleased with himself.

Riiiight up until the topic of the dating pool came up.

“Oh no, this is all wrong.” Rung said, pursing his lip-plates at the chalkboard Swerve kept hidden in the back. “Completely and totally wrong.”

“That so?” Whirl found himself compelled to ask.

“Of course. Pairing Rodimus up with Thunderclash? Or Drift? When he has a blatant crush on Ultra Magnus and Megatron? Honestly.”

“Megatron?” Rewind repeated, turning to face the orange mech.

“Yes.” Rung said without explaining further, as though his reasons was obvious. “Tailgate and Cyclonus is the most obvious pair here, though Tailgate could easily pair off with Swerve, while Cyclonus could find success with Whirl. Whirl, you would do well with myself, Cyclonus or Brainstorm. Brainstorm,” Rung turned, talking rabid-fire while keeping track of the mechs he was talking too, “–would do best with Perceptor, through Whirl and Nautica are also good matches for you.”

Having thus swept out four of the various relationship possibilities on the board and somehow adding in three new ones no one had thought of, Rung whipped about to focus on Swerve. “Swerve, your best pairings would be Tailgate, Skids, or Ultra Magnus. If you are open to a tri-pairing, I would highly recommend you actually step in-between him and Rodimus. The three of you would balance each other out well, though you and Rodimus would do poorly without a third.”

Swerve, who was desperately trying to clear his intake after choking on his drink, could only get out a hisses; “What!?” before Rung was off again.

“Speaking of thirds, Whirl–I recommend you pair off with Tailgate and Cyclonus if you are open to a third party.” Rung went back to the board, tapping a servo on his chin. “Rewind and Chromedome–are you seeking a third?”

“No.” Chromedome said, before Rewind’s curiosity could get the better of him.

“Right then, sorry Brainstorm.”–Which prompted all three mechs to jerk back from each other, startled.

“Mirage and Hound, and Mirage and Ravage, are your next obvious choices. From there…” Rung stared into the board, as though seeing the secrets of the universe. “Well, I’d say Ratchet and Drift is a given so at least you all got that right.”

He got a whole boatload of silence as his answer.

“Say…Rung.” Rewind said, recovering faster than anyone else. “Who would you pair yourself with? Besides Whirl.”

“Skids.” Rung answered easily, smiling at the mech in question. “Or Nightbeat. Possibly Ratchet but we had a thing in medical school…”

“Oh this story I want to hear.” Whirl croaked out, struggling for some form of normality.

“No we don’t.” Squeaked Tailgate, who was looking at Cyclonus like his secret cover was blown.

Rung just smiled and told it anyway.